You would think that would be a clever euphemism for reduction of my boobages but, no, I’m not talking about those things. Those are still somewhat valuable (though not nearly as useful as they used to be – but that’s another post for another day).
Last week I found myself upset. It’s to do with this whole blogging thing. So I stepped away from it for a few days to get perspective. It helped, and I’ll tell you why shortly. Bear with me – I need to tell this in order or ya’ll want to strangle me by the end.
(By the way, the “ya’ll” is Joni’s fault entirely. Or my Okie ancestry. One of the two.)
Okay, so if you’ve been here before you know that I started blogging just a few months ago and I’m kinda haphazard about when I do it and what I post. That’s just me and the way I am. It has to fit into my life; I’m not going to make my life fit around it.
Early last week I had some time to really start poking around other blogs and see what other mom bloggers were doing. I started following some of them on Twitter and going to their blogs and all that. What you may or may not know is there are amateur mom bloggers (ahem, me) and then there are professional mom bloggers (like the gold standard, The Pioneer Woman). Let me tell you, some of those ladies are hardcore. They get paid for what they do and they compete and, to the crux of the story, they can be extremely catty. I’m not referring to the Pioneer Woman here; I think she has a “rise above it” attitude even though there is a hate site out there about her too.
Apparently there was some issue last week and Twitter was, forgive me, all “atwitter” about it. I kept seeing these cryptic posts about being mean and making fun of someone and how it was hurting the mom blogging community. Then I read this tweet by one of those professional types:
It’s just easy to forget that twitter is like a high school cafeteria. Even if you’re not at the table you hear what people say about you.
And then I was like, oh, yeah, yuck.
Caveat: I am in no way, no how, ever going to be on par with those professional bloggers. That’s not my intention. Seriously though, who would want that? Who would ever want to feel like they are in high school again? To get criticized and mocked and made to feel worthless. UGH. Also, I KNOW adult woman cattiness. I’ve experienced it. It’s not pretty and it’s hurtful.
So, quite honestly, I was like yeah, I’m just going to cool it for awhile. Not that I was comparing myself to them because I SO wasn’t; I just didn’t want anything to do with it. It left a bad taste in my mouth if you know what I mean.
So I hung out with family and friends over the weekend. I went on a date with my husband. I had wine at a friend’s house. I cleaned out a room in my house. I baked cookies. I kissed my kids A LOT. (Oh, I also got iPhone 4 so, you know, I was busy. Plants vs. Zombies, Instagram, etc). It was a nice weekend.
Back to work today and I was asked twice why I hadn’t updated my blog. It’s been like 6 days and apparently I have at least TWO readers who were jonesin’ for an update. And that felt good. And that made me think that yeah, that crap happens over THERE, with those other bloggers who are so successful that people make hate sites about them and have whole password-protected forums just to diss on them – but that’s like another world from over HERE where I am. (Run-on sentence be damned. I never said I was perfect).
If I ever get to the point where I have haters then I’ll know I’m successful. ‘Til then I’m happy. If one person wants to read what I have to say then I.Am.Happy.
So that brings me to the other item I need to get off my chest:
Both of the people who asked me about my blog today are lurkers. One of them literally IM’d me and said, “Can you post something new on your blog so I can stalk it?”
Well, thanks for coming out of the closet on that but – DUDE – leave a comment, wouldja?
OY. I THRIVE on comments. And I answer them. So, just do it. You can even tell me anonymously how awesome I am. I won’t mind. Honest.
In closing, I just want to say that I love all two of you. Just don’t ever make a hate site about me or I’ll kick your ass.
Hasta pasta! Mwah!
11 thoughts on “I have a couple things I need to get off my chest”
1st….AWESOME on the iPhone….I LOVE mine…oh my gosh…love it!!!!! Congrats :0)2nd…love your blog and I could never make a hate site, plus you know where I live..heheI have been contemplating on starting mine up again too, but I never know what to talk about or say.Keep up the good work and enjoy your family!!!
Ok I read. Faithfully. But I like you sometimes feel the need to step away. I figured that was what you were doing. And I'm glad. Boundaries and healthy balance are important. I must remind myself of this. Continually. Also as far as the big bloggers go. Mckmama. Dooce. PW. Yeah. I'll never compete and I don't want to. I got enough hate got talking about Victorias secret and letting my kid cry. So no thanks. I don't blog for the public. I blog for me sometimes I inspire or commiserate and I like that. That's good enough. You're brilliant. And you're you. More than enough.
Lacy & Joni, thanks! I love that you guys read. Lacy, you should start blogging more – it might be cathartic!Joni, like you, I blog for myself, primarily, and my small circle of friends. That's all I need. 🙂
Dude, I hear you on so many levels. I read a lot of 'healthy living' blogs and have noticed the catty amongst women there too. It makes me uncomfortable. Lets face it – people have issues. Also, I have to say this: breaking in to the blogging world is hard. I find it hard to make friends online – and then I read so many healthy living blogs where they go on about all the friends they've made online (but they never respond to my comments…hmmmm). So I feel weird about that sometimes. Anyway, I guess it's all a process. And you are right – we just have to remember WHY we are here. Why we blog. I'm cool with my 2 readers too! 🙂
Wow. That was a long, rambling comment that I should have proofread before posting. Hopefully it still makes sense. And Steph? I like reading your blog. 🙂
Elsa? I like reading yours too, and I'm not the only one. Someone at the office (who I can't out) told me today that they really enjoy stalking your blog too. (One of my two readers). 😉
You know…I was just thinking the other day about women and their cattiness. We are our own worst enemies. It's disgusting.Oh, and I just got an iPhone4 the other day too! I LOVE IT!! Now we can Facetime! 🙂
Woo. :)Yours is the only blog I read. I enjoyed this one. I had no idea that blogging was competetive or that were such things as blog haters and password protected hating sites. Eek. I find it hard to believe (and a lot appalling) that people post nasty words to others on public forums but I am admittedly and willingly ignorant to those sorts of things. I love you more than the Easter Bunny loves Cadbury Eggs. It's the truth.-You know who
OK! I'm a blog stalker. Can't anyone do anything creepy and just get away with it anymore? And I think you may have misquoted my IM. I love to read your posts and see that I'm not the only crazy one. 🙂 Its fun to get a glimpse of life outside of this wild office world. So roll on rollercoaster, keep those blogs coming. I need some good stalking for the late nights with my kiddo.
I guess I need to take a lesson on how to "follow" a blog, because I just bookmark the ones I like and go back to them once every couple of weeks to catch up. Yours included. I'm a self-proclaimed "blog-stalker". I even tried to leave a comment once on here and must have done it wrong because it never showed up. Yep, I'm a dork. But I love your blog. 😉 This is Jenni by the way. I don't even know what to select for "profile" to make my comment show up. Let's see if this works…
Armella, I'm dying to try the facetime! Sometime we will. Anon – I love you too, freako. Lis – I DIDN'T out you! You could have remained anonymous – but I'm so glad you didn't. Thanks for coming out of lurkerdom.Jen – I can help you. I use iGoogle for my homepage and have a tab dedicated to blogs. Then you just have to subscribe using Google. However I know other people use Readers. I haven't tried that as much.